May 2010

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are the eighth commandment of Memorial Day BBQ style: • Hulk Hogan will do a lot to entertain you.  But he won’t wrestle Bedrock cartoons with cankles in the name of selling surgery cereals.  He’s pissed—ala Lindsay Lohan v. E*Trade—about the use of his apparent likeness in the commercial [...]

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as transformative as Willie Nelson sans braids: • “A sexy matchmaker fired back today at the lonelyheart lawyer who sued her after paying $10,000 to be paired up with dreamgirls he says were duds.  ‘There’s only so much I can do,’” Amy Laurent, the head of high-end dating service Amy [...]

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that can’t keep up with our son’s two-pack-a-day habit: • Funny how the English are stereotypically known for awful dental care but there was a possibility that breasts could have been ruled a human right.  “A 58-year-old British transsexual Tuesday lost her court battle over the state-funded health service’s refusal [...]

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that did NOT mutilate and kill your cat, but our pit bull did: • One of our favorite blogs is Ugliest Tattoos (see example below).  And you can’t be featured on that site if you don’t get genius inked art needled onto your body.  And you can’t get genius inked [...]

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as androgynous-ly erogenous as Venus Williams’ naughty nighty: • A woman who was told she was a big Hooter has decided to be a legal shooter.  Cassandra Marie Smith sued restaurant chain Hooters for weight discrimination—which is, evidently, a cause of action in Michigan—because she was allegedly placed on a [...]

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that have spent most the day playing Google Pac-Man: • Are words like ”furburger,” ”schmeckle” and “blowjob” appropriate terms to be using in a sex-ed classroom?  A Brooklyn federal judge says they are.  He supported a teacher who sued after she was ironically thrown into the “rubber room” when parents [...]