Bitter and Abused

If your law firm is anything like mine, now is the time of year where you sit down with your managing partner and some senior associate. The associate knows you from the barcode on your arm. The partner, probably just doesn’t know you at all. These two people spend about thirty minutes explaining your progress [...]

Post image for Stop Calling Me Cupcake

Everyone at my law firm is calling me “cupcake.” It’s been this way for the past two weeks.

Post image for Nix the Crappy Cover Letter, Let’s Talk Kickbacks

You forward my resume to the hiring partner or committee, with a note that the firm should take a close look at me. If hired, I become your bitch.

Post image for We’re Keeping the Goddamn Hereins Herein

I was once a young associate in a small firm, and I thought I knew better. As in I knew how to write better than the four partners for whom I worked, including the one partner who only dictated. Most of the time I think I was right, but in retrospect it may not have [...]

Post image for Friend’s Family Law Bitch

When you’re young and new to the law, there are tons of ways to foresee yourself being abused as a lawyer. Especially a low-rent attorney like me.

Post image for This Toy Operates on Battery

Blah blah blah. And then, about a minute later, he drops a bomb. “So, [Cathy], how’s your vagina?”

Post image for Associate Swap: What Happens When You’re Derailed Off Partner Track

Why did two female lawyers quickly swap practice groups unannounced and without justification?

Post image for Screening the BigLaw Un-Firm

My law firm doesn’t have a modicum of concern about its associates’ health.

This was it.  The year I finally decided to do it.  After three years of relentless work and zero (count ‘um—zero) vacations or sick days, I told HR, my boss and my secretary last October that I would be taking off the week of January 12.  My boss (I’ll call Eric), who’s the partner I [...]

Post image for You Can Never Un-See Partner Porn

What the hell is it about men that makes them get such a kick out of making women feel uncomfortable? Seriously. The IP boutique firm I worked for until recently had two offices. One in Palo Alto, one in San Francisco. I worked in the Palo Alto office, but one day I was called to visit the San [...]