Bitter Factoids

15 — Number of Different Female Law Students I made out with (3rd base or above) in my 3 years of law school before I realized I would not be compatible with because of their common shallowness, desire for money, and extremely poor personal hygiene.  These three character flaws have caused me to seek out women who are not admitted to the bar.

Here’s how you identify fake BL1Y: He’s even less funny than real BL1Y, a feat only fake BL1Y can accomplish.

Oh come on, are you serious?  Does anyone actually believe that BL1Y would insist on a serious relationship before bedding down with someone?  Fake BL1Y is not even trying this morning.  Come on FBL1Y, if you’re not bringing your A game to the table, don’t bother playing.

NADA-ZERO (0):  The number of chances I would ever give you, Dougan (or BL1Y, for that matter), to access my “cooter”.  (I thought that expression belonged only in Arkansas, but I gues it has spread north).

4: Number of hours I’ve billed this month.

that failure from Yale must feel like a douche

I think the men on this site ought to have wet dreams about Diedre Clark, who is writing the racy novel that her law firm banned her from further publication.  If I were a guy, I’d think about boning her myself.  Hot pics for the guys.  Who said female associates were dogs.  This woman disproves that theory.  Men, don’t shoot your wads all at once.

Alex: She looks old and used up and has confused being thin and provocative with being sexy.  My guess is she is escaping to the world of fiction and fantasy as a way to live through the youth she wanted but could never quite get.

Alma, I can feel the spite in your posts, so I’m guessing that dime dropped out on you a long time ago and yet you’re still single.  I can’t imagine why!

Yea, I’d love to BONE Alma—is she related to Roger?

Cut that poor girl some slack.  Alma may well have been burned by men, but that is no reason not to have compassion on her now.  She may still get over her bitterness with a little compassion from this group.  That includes all of you men.  Remember, someday you will be looking for compassion, too, and it could be someone like Alma or me who will be there for you.

Maybe they should call it the “Bitter LIMP Tool Club” because that B1LY guy’s needle dick must be as bitter as a sprig of old asparagus without any hollandaise sauce.

Yes, “Ace in the Hole”, we may be venting, but it’s because you guys say and do almost anything to get to the hole.  And we’re not talking golf or basketball.  Many of us have been decieved by men (lawyers) who promised us the moon (if not marriage) only to go by the wayside after they had their way (sexually) with us.  So if we are bitter, that’s why.  The men who dumped us for better grazing are also bitter because the models they drool after are not receptive.  After all, why would a woman making $30,000/day for a shoot care about some gnome who has a legal degree.  That is the dude that dumped me, though so I am bitter.

Anon (and other bitter women here), you may want to consider that the reason you were dumped may not have been because he was looking for a model. 
Many men these days are tired of women who expect the moon.  A huge number of modern U.S. women seem to want to be able to choose between equality when they want it, and men taking care of all those things they don’t want to be bothered with the rest of the time.  Are you cooking for your guy?  Doing the laundry and cleaning the house?  Making sure his other “needs” are satisfied?  Or instead, are you making further demands on him when he gets home from work and making his life more difficult instead of easier, and thinking that putting out every once in a while makes you even for everything you ask? 
If you’re telling him you want to get married and have kids, but aren’t treating him like the king of the castle and the person who will provide for you, why on earth would he make that choice?  Marrying a woman who will expect a six figure lifestyle and won’t either work to provide it or take care of the home and kids is something few smart men are interested in – putting you up so that you can shop and play while he pays for a nanny to take care of the kids, restaurants to get a decent meal, and a maid to get a clean place after he’s worked 12 hour days is not an interesting proposition.
As it happens, women’s liberation on all-or-nothing terms, rendering men merely servants to spend their lives working just for a little sex, turned out to be liberation to be live and die alone.  Real men, the kind you would be attracted to rather than doormats who can’t get laid in a paper bag, would rather pay for a whore who will do anything we want on demand if that’s all you’re giving us anyway (and on vastly less favorable terms).
—Guy Who Married an Accomplished Woman Who Still Realizes That She Has To Run The House To Make This An Equal Exchange

You know what I mean… and pardon the extra “be” in my rant.  Sorry, one of my buddies gave up and cracked, married an “expect the world” woman against the advice of his friends (including yours truly), and then recently divorced her.  She’s living on his “child support” payments, and it’s hard to watch even from a distance.

Yep that’s it—bitter tool club! and you tools know who you are…….

And I meant to say that Bitter Women LAWYERS are REALLY bitter down there.  Ptuey!

You men are awful.  We have compassion, but don’t get it returned by you self-absorbed peckers.  Do you really think we enjoying going down on you guys?  Of course not, but we do it out of love, devotion and respect, not just to squeeze some money out of you guys.  Think about it next time you ask us for a BJ, because we should not give them until we get the respect we deserve.  I call upon all bitter women to resist the advances of men like this.

Some women actually enjoy giving BJs.  I’ve seen it happen.

I agree with “Ace In the Hole”.  As far as the woman below “Agree” is concerned, I would love to find a smart sexy and sassy woman who was NOT self absorbed and interested only in herself and me pleasing HER all the time.  I think it’s a question of upbringing.  Those women like you, who think they are owed everything, rarely do anything for a man unless it benefits her (for example, a BJ preceding getting rammed).  But ask that same woman for a standalone BJ {when she is not going to get rammed], fuggetaboutit; she’s either too tired, has a headache, has to get up early, has a sore throat, just got her hair done; you name it.  The same thing when a guy comes home after a long day at work, and asks what’s for dinner, and the woman says (after spending the day running up the credit card at Lord & Taylor, Gee, I haven’t had time to think about it.  How about calling out for some [Chinese/Italian/Thai/ETC, ETC].  What should we say about that, Wonder Woman?  Should we just chalk it up to “her feelings”; should we say anything?  If we do, the proverbial legs clamp shut for days, if not weeks.  That’s what leads men to find attractive women who are not so f***ing demanding.  A young innocent secretary starts looking good when the shrew at home does nothing but spend money and whine.  So “smart and sassy” woman, know the road you are heading down, and perhaps it’s not too late to veer off away from the dead end you are heading towards.  If a guy wants you to be sweet, be sweet, since he’s always jumping for you, stop being such a pain in the f*****ing ass whenever he has an idea that does not immediately appeal to you.  Sure you may have a college/law degree and a honey-hole, but that does not give you a ticket to becoming an autocrat, or you can join the long line of middle age bitter divorcees when your man finds solace with a younger, more understanding, woman.

Right.  A woman should be smart enough to know when to shut her mouth, and when to open her mouth.  If she’s doesn’t know, then I want no part of her (literally and figuratively).  Beeotches!

Dream on BL1Y you have no female fans!!