Bitter News, 10-30-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that wonder if anyone could care about Briteny’s new 3 video:

• Boo!  (I know it’s rude to sneak up on someone on a blog and just “Boo” them like that, but tis the season.) Joan Lukey, currently a partner in the Boston office of Ropes & Gray, recalls a case of a company CEO who celebrated Halloween by wearing a different costume to each day of a six-day deposition.  Nothing says “trustworthy visionary” quite like a life-size Mr. Peanut.  [The Am Law Daily]

• Madoff’s accountant, David Friehling, plans to plead guilty next week.  There is a cooperation agreement with the government in place, but still—he’s facing seven counts with a sentence of 20 years and fines of up to $5 million, which means he could be giving up the cocaine life and eating pedophile-prepared Pizza with Bernie for up to 105 years.  [The Boston Globe]

• The Polyamorous Paralegal, a “26, single(ish), East Village, straight” chick, has her between-the-sheets life resurrected in this week’s “The Sex Diary” edition of New York Magazine.  She decided her life after hours was so hot and interesting that she might as well put it on shout.  Along with 141 other Sex Diaries, she completes a tableau of how the Big Apple bumps uglies.  [New York Magazine]

• “Pierce County Superior Court Judge Michael Hecht, found guilty of a felony for harassing a prostitute, will keep collecting his public [$148K annual] paycheck for the moment.” We mentioned Hecht in last week’s The Bitter Five when he said “antique shopping’ was his alibi as to why he was trolling a male prostitute section of Tacoma, WA.  Legal scholars are now forced to wonder now what happens when a judge is convicted of a crime (since we all know most aren’t)?  [The News Tribune via ABA Journal]

• Who originally ruled a weekday should be five days anyway?  The Connecticut Law Review’s Annual Symposium today will analyze the implementation of a four-day workweek.  “Benefits of a shortened week could potentially include: reducing unemployment, reducing energy use and costs, reducing commuting times—thereby improving the environment and quality of community life, improving workplace morale while reducing stress-based injury rates and absenteeism.” Sounds good.  Let’s fast track this issue.  [ConnecticutPlus.com]

• Rain in Houston on Thursday caused legendary, “flamboyant” attorney John O’Quinn to lose control of his SUV, which resulted in an accident that took his life.  Both revered and reviled, O’Quinn made a fortune, winning billions in verdicts against makers of breast implants, pharmaceuticals and tobacco products.  He was known for his lavish spending and donations to philanthropic causes and Democratic campaigns—but many now think he “felt trapped by public persona.” [Houston Chronicle]

• Give me the deets on all those law firm mergers already.  Dyin’ here.  [Wall Street Journal]

• “What is it with people nowadays?  Can’t celebrities take advantage of their fame, wealth, and power for sexual gain?” The legal troubles surrounding more than a handful of male celebrities these days has a lot of people (mostly men) longing for the old days of low-profile casual encounters.  [Nice Pick, Cowher]

• Federal Judge David O. Carter has dismissed Barnett et al v. Obama et al, attorney Orly Taitz’s “most successful lawsuit—that is, the one that got the furthest through the legal system”—which demanded proof that the president was born in the U.S. and not in Kenya, as she suspects.  And Carter gave ol’ Orly a little lashing in the process.  He wrote that he was “deeply concerned” that Taitz “may have suborned perjury through witnesses she intended to bring before this court.” And there was something about “improper and unethical” in there too.  (The judge’s total ruling can be read here.) Which means it’s probably back to polishing teeth for Orly.  [The Washington Independent | The Smoking Gun]

http://washingtonindependent.com/65703/orly-taitz-smacked-down-birther-lawsuit-dismissed

• Fat (not with a “p-h”) Edward Ates, who testified he was physically too large to be capable of murdering his son-in-law, is still trying to sell that defense.  [ABC News]

• A Gonzaga University Law School student is…an idiot. Zac Gorrill says “he was sitting by his basement apartment window when someone came by and struck up a conversation.  Gorrill, who was trying to make friends, invited the stranger in.” The stranger then suspiciously imposed even more by calling and inviting a bunch of his stranger friends over to Gorrill’s pad.  And guess what—they robbed his ass.  Video below… [KTVB.com]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that wonder if anyone could care about Briteny’s new 3 video:

• Boo!  (I know it’s rude to sneak up on someone on a blog and just “Boo” them like that, but tis the season.) Joan Lukey, currently a partner in the Boston office of Ropes & Gray, recalls a case of a company CEO who celebrated Halloween by wearing a different costume to each day of a six-day deposition.  Nothing says “trustworthy visionary” quite like a life-size Mr. Peanut.  [The Am Law Daily]

• Madoff’s accountant, David Friehling, plans to plead guilty next week.  There is a cooperation agreement with the government in place, but still—he’s facing seven counts with a sentence of 20 years and fines of up to $5 million, which means he could be giving up the cocaine life and eating pedophile-prepared Pizza with Bernie for up to 105 years.  [The Boston Globe]

Read more from the Bitter Newsroom.

1 Comment

  1. New Yorker

    November 2, 2009 at 1:04 pm

    Where is the weekly news video?

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