Bitter News, 11-30-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are off to as “good” of start as Cyber Monday:

• Generally when you hear “Amazon” on Cyber Monday, you’re thinking online deal hunting and drooling over your Christmas wishlist.  But what if you were hunting and drooling over swimsuit model Amazon Eve (AKA Babezilla) instead?  That would mean you have one of “the softest of the soft-core fetishes” because she’s a 210-pound, 6’8” redhead who recently appeared in the Australian magazine Zoo Weekly, having dropped out of law school to become a dominatrix.  High, high five.  [New York Post]

• It’s the story of the potentially fallen great your can’t escape—what’s the deal with Tiger Woods?  Will he come clean?  Will there be legal action?  He lawyered up with the swampland’s second coming of Johnnie Cochran.  And his alleged mistress (obnoxiously) lawyered up.  Not to mention, hundreds of millions in product endorsements are in the air.  So Bitter Lawyer interviewee, former Cravath attorney and investigative journalist Gerald Posner takes a look at the possible financial implications—beyond the deductible for the ’09 Escalade.  [The Daily Beast]

• The other story you can’t shake?  Those pesky Salahis.  They’ve been called to testify before Congress on Thursday about their crashing of Obama’s first state dinner—and criminal charges are rumored, which could take them from the White House to the Big House.  [Associated Press]

• The results of a Bitter Poll last month (below) indicated that 70% thought making partner was still in sight.  And lucky you—because it seems like you were wrong.  “The bar has been raised on what it means to become an equity partner and to stay an equity partner.” Now what?  [New York Law Journal via ABA Journal]

• Free law school at Georgetown!  Only partially kidding.  They have a new Loan Repayment Assistance Program where people working in public service only pay 10% of their income toward their student loans—and after 10 years, all is forgiven.  If only wives were so kind.  [NBC Washington]

• Haven’t seen Fantastic Mr. Fox yet?  Then you haven’t seen Bill Murray play a lawyer…who’s a badger.  Even children love lawyer jokes.  [Kansas City Star]

• Close but no cigar.  Philladelphia hasn’t been hit with the massive “implosion of the legal market” because though in proximity to Manhattan, it was shielded them from being hit with the ruins of Wall Street.  I mean, it still sucks for lawyers in Philly.  It just sucks less.  [Philly.com]

• England may have a queen, but there aren’t many queens ruling in English law firms—except as HR directors.  For obvious reasons.  [Law Gazette]

• And perhaps one of those HR professionals could have helped out Theodora Benedict.  She claims she was fired from her job as a legal secretary at the New York law firm Tarnow & Juvelier following an announcement that she was taking off two weeks for cancer surgery.  Somewhere the lines of communication got crossed from “You’re always welcome to work for me” to “You’re getting the boot, cancer lady.” [The New York Post]

• Why the hell can’t anyone pass the bar at Case Western Reserve law school?  [Crain’s Cleveland]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are off to as “good” of start as Cyber Monday:

• Generally when you hear “Amazon” on Cyber Monday, you’re thinking online deal hunting and drooling over your Christmas wishlist.  But what if you were hunting and drooling over swimsuit model Amazon Eve (AKA Babezilla) instead?  That would mean you have one of “the softest of the soft-core fetishes” because she’s a 210-pound, 6’8” redhead who recently appeared in the Australian magazine Zoo Weekly, having dropped out of law school to become a dominatrix.  High, high five.  [New York Post]

• It’s the story of the potentially fallen great your can’t escape—what’s the deal with Tiger Woods?  Will he come clean?  Will there be legal action?  He lawyered up with the swampland’s second coming of Johnnie Cochran.  And his alleged mistress (obnoxiously) lawyered up.  Not to mention, hundreds of millions in product endorsements are in the air.  So Bitter Lawyer interviewee, former Cravath attorney and investigative journalist Gerald Posner takes a look at the possible financial implications—beyond the deductible for the ’09 Escalade.  [The Daily Beast]

• The other story you can’t shake?  Those pesky Salahis.  They’ve been called to testify before Congress on Thursday about their crashing of Obama’s first state dinner—and criminal charges are rumored, which could take them from the White House to the Big House.  [Associated Press]

Read more from the Bitter Newsroom.

1 Comment

  1. Lady lawyer

    November 30, 2009 at 3:57 pm

    If Theodora was Ted with the male testicles form of cancer, this would of never happened.  I truly hope she wins her case. 

    Where are all you female lawyers, can you respond to this?

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