Bitter News, 12-10-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as smutty as Frosty the Snowman:

• Despite arguing that he’s old and lacks “sexual vigor,” 83-year-old attorney Murdoch Hertzog has been suspended for allegedly asking female clients to work off their legal fees by performing sex acts on his “couch of restitution.” But it seems like he also lacks short-term memory, which is common with age: “One woman testified that after complying with Hertzog’s request for oral sex to pay for his services, he still sent her an invoice.” [The Detroit News]

• Send in the clowns.  Here’s the sad, year-end state of the American legal market:

—U.S. law firm revenue is expected to fall 5 to 10 percent this year.  [Bloomberg]

—Associate pay cuts are here to stay.  [The Am Law Daily]

—Some law firms have begun firing equity partners.  [ABA Journal]

—BigLaw & the ‘Tsunami Economy’: Demand down, billing rates up.  [WSJ Law Blog]

• The Florida Judicial Ethics Advisory Committee said that judges shouldn’t ‘friend’ lawyers on Facebook who appear before them in court.  It makes lawyers look like suck-ups anyway.  [The Business Insider]

• Stop writing like an idiot.  Judge’s orders.  And if you needed more reasons not to write in all caps other than “PEOPLE HATE IT,” here’s a whole list of how to avoid every bad legal writing practice from Minnesota bankruptcy court judge Robert Kressel.  [Lawyerist]

• Why would Ropes & Gray need layoffs when a string of associates are going to jail?  Another lawyer connected to the firm pleaded guilty to “charges of fraud and conspiracy in connection with the Galleon Group insider trading investigation.” [Dealbook @ NYT]

• That’s cool.  Let us lose to That’s What She Said.  We see how you roll.  Are you kidding?  Get off your duff and vote for Bitter Lawyer already.  [ABA Journal]

• Masshole public law school, here we come.  [Boston.com]

• Lawyers for Roman Polanski asked three appeals court justices in Los Angeles to dismiss the rape charges against their client today. Prosecutors, of course, want the case to proceed.  “The issue before a state appellate court predates Polanski’s September arrest in Zurich and concerns the nuances of a 19th-century legal doctrine.” And statutory rape convictions now result in sentences four-times longer than they did in 1978.  What fun twists!  [Los Angeles Times]

• If you ever considered law school to be “a nunnery in which to commit penance for unprofitable undergraduate choices,” then you’ll have to take a real vow of poverty if you want to go to UC Berkeley’s Boalt Hall.  Under the UC system’s new fee schedule, it will have “the highest professional fee, a $31,355 surcharge that will bring total annual costs for California residents, not including room, board and books, to $44,200, up 21% from this year.” [Los Angeles Times]

• Before the joys of Christmas, law students must first face finals.  (Unless you go to Baylor University School of Law in Waco, which doesn’t have winter finals til February.) But winter break is around the corner—and here are ways for you to fill you time.  Other than relax, eat, sleep, repeat.  [Today@ULaw]

• Alabama now has the highest paid state attorney general in the United States at $168K.  And you thought it was one of the poorest, low-wage states in America… Well, you’re still right.  [AP via Los Angeles Times]

Check out more news from previous days.

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as smutty as Frosty the Snowman:

• Despite arguing that he’s old and lacks “sexual vigor,” 83-year-old attorney Murdoch Hertzog has been suspended for allegedly asking female clients to work off their legal fees by performing sex acts on his “couch of restitution.” But it seems like he also lacks short-term memory, which is common with age: “One woman testified that after complying with Hertzog’s request for oral sex to pay for his services, he still sent her an invoice.” [The Detroit News]

• Send in the clowns.  Here’s the sad, year-end state of the American legal market:

—U.S. law firm revenue is expected to fall 5 to 10 percent this year.  [Bloomberg]

—Associate pay cuts are here to stay.  [The Am Law Daily]

—Some law firms have begun firing equity partners.  [ABA Journal]

—BigLaw & the ‘Tsunami Economy’: Demand down, billing rates up.  [WSJ Law Blog]

Read more from the Bitter Newsroom.

4 Comments

  1. The Namby Pamby

    December 10, 2009 at 2:22 pm

    No one wants to lose to That’s What She Said…but I got a bad feeling about it happening to me

  2. Anon

    December 10, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    Bitter Lawyer readers suck.  Bitch and moan, bitch and moan and they don’t even support the site that enables their bitching and moaning.  ATL rules!

  3. SFLawyer

    December 11, 2009 at 5:46 am

    I almost agree with you Anon, some readers lack a sense of humor but maybe that is because they are always bitching.  How bad does the economy have to be before you are thankful for a JOB unless MOM and DADDY are sending them money?

  4. Big Boy

    December 11, 2009 at 7:04 am

    Yes, ATL is boring and lame.  But at least their readers vote for their site.  270 votes to 68.  Not even close bitter bitches.  Like Anon said, ATL rules.

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