Bitter News, 12-3-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as hot as the extra $5K Sullivan is throwing at their 2002 class:

• Germany is a lawyer’s best friend.  Unlike “at-will” employment in America, the Deutsch don’t allow you to “simply cut employees in order to cut costs.” British firms like Allen & Overy and Clifford Chance have been forced to reinstate lawyers the courts ruled wrongfully terminated, which has just about every lawyer on the planet wanting to declare, “Ich bin ein Berliner.” [The American Lawyer]

• Sorry, TTT-ers—rankings matter.  Right, USC Law? “Like it or not, the U.S. News & World Report‘s annual ranking of law schools profoundly influences the way those schools are managed, spend resources and are perceived internally and by the outside world.” In a report called “Fear of Falling,” two sociology professors surveyed a variety within legal academia and found that administrators will do anything to game the system because “the law school students interviewed reported that U.S. News ranking were the biggest influence on which schools they apply to.” That statement, in turn, pretty much supports the Government Accountability Office’s recent report that rankings are to blame for higher law school tuition.  And that’s what we in the biz like to call “synergy.” [The National Law Journal]

• And how might this affect its ranking?: Washington University in St. Louis (currently ranked #19) “became the first top law school to allow students to earn both a juris doctorate and a master of laws in taxation in six semesters without any summer coursework.” [Washington University Record]

• No, this is not one of those spam fishing emails you kinda wish you knew better than to reply to.  “A lawyer in Kansas City, Kan., says he may someday have a second life as a king in Nigeria.” Hmm, I wonder how many American defense and plaintiff attorneys can call themselves “a prince in the Yoruba tribe in southwest Nigeria” with a straight face?  Well, probably more than you’d think.  But only Adebayo Ogunmeno can do it truthfully.  [Fox4KC]

• Riddle me this: Save Bitter Lawyer, “why are blogs associated with large law firms sometimes so boring?” Well, it has to do with blogging being risky—and you get one guess as to what lawyers like to avoid most in life.  If only Akin Gump’s SCOTUS Blog would run more headlines like, “You Sinful Front Huggers Can Go to Hell! You Go to Hell and Die!” Because then suddenly you would have hooked me.  [ABA Journal]

• Everyone is tee-d off at Tiger Woods.  Understated, demure attorney Gloria Allred, who’s having a press conference Thursday regarding her client Rachel Uchitel’s denial of an affair with Woods, is sure to send a brusque comment or two in Tiger’s direction.  And golfer Jesper Parnevik, who first introduced Woods to his wife, Elin, is being quite outspoken by saying he feels “really sorry for Elin” and that he “thought [Woods] was a better guy than he is.” So what can we lawyers take away from all of this?  Message!!! Since we know some of you enjoy a sexual indiscretion from time to time, here’s a fact to remember: “Everything we commit to the digital space—not just our public blogs and broadcast tweets, but every private text message, email, and voicemail is likely to be stored and accessible. Forever.” Mmmmkay?  [The Daily Beast]

• Things you always love to read about lawyers doing: Skirmishing.  Counsel for alleged Fort Hood killer Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan is hemming and hawing a little over when to schedule that pesky sanity examination for his client.  [Dallas Morning News]

• Here are ten myths the general public believes about jury duty.  And it is a pity that every dismissal doesn’t end as laymen imagine: In an awkward, The Bachelor-like “After the final voir dire” episode where lawyers explain to potential jurors why weren’t picked.  [Justice|e-Learning]

• Who would have thought that trial lawyers were responsible for something as delicious at the BBQ Chicken Pizza?  I do not object that those pies of beauty.  Here’s how Larry Flax and Rick Rosenfield headed out of the courtroom and into California Pizza Kitchen.  [Wall Street Journal]

• In bitter = sad news, missing University of Michigan Law School student Casey Neil McGinnis was found dead on Wednesday.  His body was discovered in an apparent suicide.  [AnnArbor.com]

• While we’re all pretty much thankful we’re no part of a two-year murder trial in Italy like Amanda Knox, it now looks like not even a “not guilty” verdict can really get her off the hook.  [Global Post]

• How is director Oliver Stone using the themes of greed and envy from 1988’s Wall Street in his modern-day sequel?  He’s adding some major banks, a few hedge funds, the Federal Reserve Bank and replacing Gordon Gekko’s “greed is good” with “greed is now legal.” Amen.  [Associated Press]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as hot as the extra $5K Sullivan is throwing at their 2002 class:

• Germany is a lawyer’s best friend.  Unlike “at-will” employment in America, the Deutsch don’t allow you to “simply cut employees in order to cut costs.” British firms like Allen & Overy and Clifford Chance have been forced to reinstate lawyers the courts ruled wrongfully terminated, which has just about every lawyer on the planet wanting to declare, “Ich bin ein Berliner.” [The American Lawyer]

• Sorry, TTT-ers—rankings matter.  Right, USC Law? “Like it or not, the U.S. News & World Report‘s annual ranking of law schools profoundly influences the way those schools are managed, spend resources and are perceived internally and by the outside world.” In a report called “Fear of Falling,” two sociology professors surveyed a variety within legal academia and found that administrators will do anything to game the system because “the law school students interviewed reported that U.S. News ranking were the biggest influence on which schools they apply to.” That statement, in turn, pretty much supports the Government Accountability Office’s recent report that rankings are to blame for higher law school tuition.  And that’s what we in the biz like to call “synergy.” [The National Law Journal]

• And how might this affect its ranking?: Washington University in St. Louis (currently ranked #19) “became the first top law school to allow students to earn both a juris doctorate and a master of laws in taxation in six semesters without any summer coursework.” [Washington University Record]

Read more from the Bitter Newsroom.

1 Comment

  1. SFLawyer

    December 3, 2009 at 7:49 pm

    Greed has always been legal if you know how to play the game, just don’t be too greedy.

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