Bitter News, 2-17-10

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as pun-y on day one of Lent as “Get your ash together”:

• You luge and tragically die.  Are your legal options limited when deciding whether to de-luge the court system with lawsuits?  Well, there is that whole “assumed risk” thing.  But it’s not necessarily an insurmountable hurdle… [WSJ Law Blog]

• Yes, that was a luge pun.  But it wasn’t as bad as these law school puns, right? “Be my Chief Justice and grant cert to this appeal (for hot, hot loving).” I rest my case.  [The Faculty Lounge]

• “I wanna be a BigLaw partner” is the new “I wanna be an astronaut.” But fret not!  There are a number of enticing, prestigious administrative roles within a law firm setting that await you.  Who needs to orbit Earth when you can skillfully pack Tang for the mission?  Crisis averted.  [BusinessWeek]

• Joe Nemechek’s last-place finish in the Daytona 500 was significant to Brock Beard.  Beard, a 27-year-old law student, “created and maintains the LASTCAR Web site, in which he keeps track of every driver who ever finished last in each of the more than 2,200 Cup races since 1949.” He balances the passion project with trying not to finish last in his class.  [Yahoo! Sports]

• Let the Facebook bashing commence.  A girl who was suspended for setting up a Facebook page criticizing her high school principal found some justice that will echo big across the interwebs: A federal magistrate ruled it was protected constitutionally under the First Amendment. “It was an opinion of a student about a teacher, that was published off-campus … was not lewd, vulgar, threatening, or advocating illegal or dangerous behavior.” Dr. Mueller, you sucked, btw.  [CNN]

• Headline: “Clan chief who taught Barack Obama dies.” Explanation: The former chief of Clan MacNeil of Barra taught a course on contract law while a visiting professor at Harvard Law School.  And that class had then-law student Obama enrolled.  [BBC News]

• Ken Starr is feeling good about his new gig—and feeling sorry for that little episode he had with Bill Clinton.  You know the one.  Clinton’s impeachment?  He defends himself against Ken Gormley, interim dean of Duquesne Law School and author of a new book about the legal proceedings.  Starr says the investigation was “conducted with honor and integrity” and that he would apologize to Clinton for it ever happening, claiming he was simply doing Janet Reno’s bidding.  [Fox News]

• A Massachusetts woman’s lawsuit against her real estate agent, claiming she had to move out of her condominium because of a neighbor’s secondhand cigarette smoke, has been extinguished.  “A jury on Tuesday deliberated less than an hour before siding with the broker.” [Boston.com]

• Torah v. Bible.  After a father had his daughter secretly baptized Catholic, his Jewish ex-wife freaked.  So a judge barred the father from exposing their child to any religion other than Judaism.  Can courts dictate faith?  Discuss.  In Hebrew.  [312 Weekly]

 

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as pun-y on day one of Lent as “Get your ash together”:

• You luge and tragically die.  Are your legal options limited when deciding whether to de-luge the court system with lawsuits?  Well, there is that whole “assumed risk” thing.  But it’s not necessarily an insurmountable hurdle… [WSJ Law Blog]

• Yes, that was a luge pun.  But it wasn’t as bad as these law school puns, right? “Be my Chief Justice and grant cert to this appeal (for hot, hot loving).” I rest my case.  [The Faculty Lounge]

Read more from the Bitter Newsroom.

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