Bitter News, 3-1-10

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as loco as the quake in Chile shifting the Earth’s axis:

• Don’t fuck with the Lords of Hell SUNY law school graduation committee.  “In a recent e-mail sent to graduating 3Ls at SUNY-Buffalo Law School, the school’s administration alluded to filing character and fitness complaints against students who are savvy with their graduation tickets.” The exact quote in the email (posted here): “No ‘scalping’ or counterfeit tickets will be allowed.  Such behavior will be reportable to the Character and Fitness committee.” While counterfeit tickets are one thing, “New York state law specifically allows the resale of tickets for whatever value the market will bear.” So you’ve basically paid thousands of dollars to a law program that won’t allow you to act within the state’s economic laws?  Sweet.  [The Legal Satyricon]

• The buzzword of the day is “diversity.” Or the lack thereof.  The big 200 law firms got a lot whiter in the last year.  Over the last two years, law firms laid off 6% of their attorneys—and in the process they ditched 9% of their minority populations.  Is that sad?  Or are they the lucky ones by being forced to jump ship before the Big Firm Titanic hits the “outrageous billable hour rates” iceberg? 

[The Am Law Daily]

• Last weekend’s Saturday Night Live with J. Lo hosting sort of blew.  So it’s probably time to let the Nutmeg Lawyer host—with special guests the “Polish Mafia.” [The Nutmeg Lawyer]

Love is no defense in teenage sex crimes, which doesn’t matter because this was way more teen maniacal lust than love.  A 19-year-old male used naked pictures of underage teen boys he hustled up by pretending to be a female on Facebook to blackmail for them for sex.  And the best his lawyer can admit is that his client’s 15-year prison sentence is fair and reasonable.  Let’s see how cunning you are at the 34.  [WKOWtv.com]

• boom.  Boom.  BOOM.  Those are the sounds of a new white-shoed behemoth approaching.  On May 1 there will be a new BigLaw world superpower on the block.  And fee-fi-fo-fum, it will be called Hogan Lovells.  [City A.M.]

• Screw moot court.  Litigation practice is so yesterday.  So how does this strike your fancy?  The First Annual Transactional Lawyering Meet this week will measure students’ “mastery of the skills involved in structuring and negotiating everything from mega-mergers to financing a multi-unit rental property.” Eleven law schools are competing to be letter-of-intent badasses.  And there’s nothing sexier than a soldier coming off the battlefield after fake negotiating the sale of a business.  [PRWeb]

• Yelp CEO: This lawsuit is bunk.  So put that in your class-action pipe and smoke it.  [ZDNet]

• Stephen B. Hrones, a Harvard-educated former Fulbright scholar who calls himself “Mr. Innocence” for getting murder and rape convictions of four prisoners thrown out, is fighting to keep his law license after accusations that allowed a paralegal in his office to pass himself off as a lawyer.  [Boston.com]

• In the video game age, we can all be lawyer punks who prosecute no-good, worthless video game bad guys.  It’s as simple as a little logic.  The new Nintendo DS game Ace Attorney Investigations: Miles Edgeworth was released last week.  And there’s no better way to kill time in Contracts.  [Wired]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as loco as the quake in Chile shifting the Earth’s axis:

• Don’t fuck with the Lords of Hell SUNY law school graduation committee.  “In a recent e-mail sent to graduating 3Ls at SUNY-Buffalo Law School, the school’s administration alluded to filing character and fitness complaints against students who are savvy with their graduation tickets.” The exact quote in the email (posted here): “No ‘scalping’ or counterfeit tickets will be allowed.  Such behavior will be reportable to the Character and Fitness committee.” While counterfeit tickets are one thing, “New York state law specifically allows the resale of tickets for whatever value the market will bear.” So you’ve basically paid thousands of dollars to a law program that won’t allow you to act within the state’s economic laws?  Sweet.  [The Legal Satyricon]

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