Bitter News, 4-19-10

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as legal related as Acie Law’s “Lawman” tattoo:

• Too bad he passed.  He would have made “a great oral advocate.” But rapper Notorious BIG is dead.  And Judge Jacqueline Nguyen just dismissed his mother’s wrongful death lawsuit.  [The Guardian]

• The SEC/Goldman Sachs lawsuit is strong enough to affect the price of copper, but what else will it change?  Well, if it can’t even affect big bonuses, is it all that likely it will be the catalyst that corrects Wall Street in ways long overdue?  Let’s be serious.  [The New Yorker]

• What the Goldman lawsuit did to copper it also did to gas prices in Florida.  Gas prices fell an average of about a penny a gallon across the state “shortly after the Securities and Exchange Commission announced that the agency plans to sue Goldman Sachs Group Inc.” [The Gainesville Sun]

• If you’re not reading this “like a lawyer,” you’re in trouble.  [ABA Journal]

• The emperor has new clothes, and the pope has an American lawyer.  With various legal cases pending against the pope and the Vatican in the United States, it would make sense for the pontiff to have his own U.S. lawyer.  Which is why he does.  And the new holy counsel is Jeffrey Lena, a 51-year-old “shy, cerebral and athletic” California attorney who is defending Pope Benedict XVI.  And, like God, he’ll need to be omnipresent because he’s got a lot work to do in a lot of area codes.  And the list keeps growing.  Now even the lawyers who represent the abused are remembering they were abused themselves. 

[Washington Post]

• Sara Smith didn’t go to law school to defend religion, she went to preach it.  After three years of being a practicing lawyer, she became the pastor of United Congregational Church.  [Connecticut Law Tribune]

• Here’s something a pre-law student may not know: Impersonating an attorney is a misdemeanor.  Don’t let your title of co-vice president of the Pre-Law Society get you drunk with power when you’re already legally drunk.  Because it will turn out a little something like this.  [Naperville Sun]

• As if these 20 reasons not to go to law school aren’t enough, here’s #21: Even your wife will be miserable.  And her only outlet may be blogging.  Welcome to The Life of a {Law School} Wife, a blog with the tragic tagline of “Law school sucks, even when you’re not in it.” This 1L spouse (who may or may not be Demi Moore?) started her digital cry for help after being handed a pamphlet on divorce while attending a law school orientation event with her husband.  She even includes a blogroll of other law school wives’ online laments, such as A Breadwinner Wife.  Misery loves company.  [The Life of a {Law School} Wife]

• Law school prom is sooooo totally high school.  Saturday’s annual prom at Yale Law (#1 and proud of it, beeotchs) was a Lady Gaga/dance floor grinding/fur shawl-filled (??) hot mess.  [Yale Daily News]

• The award for most awkwardly worded headline about two magna cum laude grads of Harvard Law would have to be, “Obama v. Roberts: The Struggle to Come.” [The New York Times]

• Bill Clinton wants a non-judge who’s not his wife nominated to the Supreme Court.  Because he wants a younger lass to take the job.  Does that automatically mean he’s Team Elena Kagan[ABC News]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as legal related as Acie Law’s “Lawman” tattoo:

• Too bad he passed.  He would have made “a great oral advocate.” But rapper Notorious BIG is dead.  And Judge Jacqueline Nguyen just dismissed his mother’s wrongful death lawsuit.  [The Guardian]

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