Bitter News, 4-23-10

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as innovative as iPad porn:

• Dribble, dribble, bounce, bounce, slam dunk.  CBS and Turner Broadcasting’s new 14-year, $10.8-billion deal for the TV and Internet rights to the NCAA March Madness tournament has scored big billables for three BigLaw firms.  [The Am Law Daily]

• Death by firing squad is still a legal way to die.  Um, yes, I’m serious.  Utah is the only state that offers that option over lethal injection, and it’s one that a state judge ordered after convicted murderer Ronnie Lee Gardner selected it.  On June 18, Gardner will be hooded and strapped to a chair as five shooters take aim at a cloth target taped over his heart. Four executioners will fire live rounds, while one weapon will have a blank.  BANG!  Fucking freaky, right??  [The Salt Lake Tribune]

• This here’s a tale for all the fellas, Try to do what those ladies tell us…

A chick walks by you wish you could sex her, [And if she’s a Thai “bar girl,” you can,] Poindexter

You want it, you’ve got it, Just bust a move.

“The Thailand Girl Scene…sounds a bit unsavory to Western sensibilities,” but this story about tenured Cal-State, Northridge Economics Professor Kenneth Ng “raises a morass of legal issues including the first amendment, academic freedom, tenure rights, and perhaps violations of federal law that prohibit enticing people to travel aboard for prostitutes.” Ng was running a blog called BigBabyKenny.com, which “offer[ed] insights into the Thai bar scene, such as where to meet beautiful women and how to negotiate fees for their services.” Ng claims he started the site after a dispute with two American businessmen who run a Thai bar/brothel he used to frequent.  He assured his blog had zero university affiliation and used no university resources, so he felt confident his off-hours speech was protected.  Well, Ng ended up in a s#!tstorm, the LA Daily News wrote a story about the situation, and today, the CSUN provost issued a statement that said Ng decided to remove the site.  We’re freaked out, curious, a little disgusted and legally piqued all at the same time.  [Adjunct Law Prof Blog]

• An SEC lawyer apparently watched porn for eight hours a day during the nation’s financial crisis.  Guess it was stress relief?  “[H]igh-ranking officials within the SEC were spending more time looking at porn than taking action to help stave off the events that put our nation’s economy on the brink of collapse.” Too bad BigBabyKenny.com no longer exists.  [ABA Journal]

• Gregory Craig was Obama’s former White House counsel, and he’s now representing Goldman Sachs.  Conflict of interest much?  [The New York Times]

• A lawyer asked a jury to punish the Boy Scouts of America so the organization would “repent.” And the jury did just that.  Awarded $18.5 million worth of repentance, to be exact.  And what Kerry Lewis just got could only be the tip of it.  [ABC News]

• What’s gay got to do with it when it comes to Obama’s new Supreme Court nominee?  Shouldn’t matter one bit, according to one opinion.  But there’s seems to be a lesbian media lens burning into Elena Kagan, Kathleen Sullivan and Pam Karlan.  (Don’t look at Diane Wood—she’s busy playing her oboe for her husband.) Not only are these ladies having their own sexuality discussed, but their “gay rights” stances are making a lot of headlines as well.  [The Seattle Times]

• Tuesdays with “University of Wisconsin Law School professor and high-profile blogger Ann Althouse.” An interview.  [Isthmus]

• Newbie actor Michael AvMen has filed “a $50 million lawsuit against The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences for illegal false imprisonment and intentional and negligent infliction of emotional distress.” He says he and his wife are in bad shape after six hours of questioning when he and his wife arrived at the Oscar Awards without tickets.  Appreciate the candor, but sadly, for an actor, it sounds like career suicide.  [Popeater]

• The pope got sued.  By a dude in Milwaukee.  2 Un-legit to Stick[National Law Journal]

• South Carolina lawyer Bill Nettles, the man who recently represented Michael Phelps “in a criminal probe sparked by publication of a photo showing him holding a bong,” was confirmed as U.S. attorney, becoming the state’s top federal prosecutor.  Nettles found out while on “a surfing vacation in the Bahamas.” Which sounds pretty 420 friendly, if you ask me.  [The Miami Herald]

• NY has a new top federal prosecutor too: Defense attorney Loretta Lynch.  [Wall Street Journal]

• What in the hell is going on with lawyers, law students and “white power?”:

—A Mississippi lawyer known as a white supremacist was found murdered.  [Clarion-Leger]

—A University of Toledo College of Law 1L and “hate group” alum has people nervous.  [Above the Law]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as innovative as iPad porn:

• Dribble, dribble, bounce, bounce, slam dunk.  CBS and Turner Broadcasting’s new 14-year, $10.8-billion deal for the TV and Internet rights to the NCAA March Madness tournament has scored big billables for three BigLaw firms.  [The Am Law Daily]

• Death by firing squad is still a legal way to die.  Um, yes, I’m serious.  Utah is the only state that offers that option over lethal injection, and it’s one that a state judge ordered after convicted murderer Ronnie Lee Gardner selected it.  On June 18, Gardner will be hooded and strapped to a chair as five shooters take aim at a cloth target taped over his heart. Four executioners will fire live rounds, while one weapon will have a blank.  BANG!  Fucking freaky, right??  [The Salt Lake Tribune]

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