Bitter News, 5-18-10

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that, unlike your daily sausage, are not ‘linked’ to heart disease:

• They ‘Evershed’ the wrong guy.  Male lawyer John de Belin was wrongfully sacked by the Leeds, England office of BigLaw firm Eversheds “because his bosses feared they would be sued if they fired his female colleague while she was on maternity leave.” So a court awarded him £123,000—or £61,500 per testicle.  [Daily Mail]

• Don’t let Betty White’s spry surge of popularity give you any ideas, decrepit law firm partners.  You’re old.  And youru firm has a mandatory retirement policy.  So it’s ‘bout time you rascal your way out, get in your Lexus that’s parked in the blue-signed spot and head out to pasture.  I’d say goodbye, but you probably wouldn’t be able to hear me.  [New York Law Journal]

• All work and no play makes us dull boys.  But it doesn’t for everyone.  If you enjoy sexless relationships or no real friends, you’re time has come.  Other like-minded people are finally speaking up: All work is all they love.  [ABA Journal]

• Couch potatoes love lawyers!  More legal-ness coming to TV this fall:

—Mark-Paul Gosselaar will be a lawyer on TNT again—this time in Franklin & Bash[EW.com]

The Whole Truth is coming to ABC, but not with Joely Richardson in it.  [Zap2It]

—Finally, Bourne producer Doug Liman’s drama A Legal Mind about “a young man who gets a job at a huge corporate law firm” may one day air on USA.  [TV Squad]

• President Obama’s Kenyan aunt, Zeituni Onyango, can go to Arizona now.  She’s been granted asylum.  [Legal Blog Watch]

• While the legal world is saturated with Ivy League graduates in high-ranking positions and a Supreme Court that boasts a “Harvard/Yale monopoly,” the top of the business world food chain is a bit more diverse—educationally speaking (not racially, of course).  These are the top 10 CEO undergraduate alma maters, including one school no lawyer has ever attended: “The School of Hard Knocks.” [Businessweek]

• For the record, LeBron James’ lawyer, Region Managing Partner Frederick Nance, would like to reiterate: LeBron’s mother, Gloria, is not—repeat: is not—playing hide the salami with his teammate Delonte West.  Again, she’s not boning him.  Here is Nance’s cease and desist.  So quite thinking about it.  [TMZ]

• Law firm library directors are like Palm Pilots.  So passé!  [3 Geeks and a Law Blog]

• Lehman Brothers trustee law firm was paid $84.4 million for 19 months’ work.  So rich, it’s almost boring.  [Businessweek]

• POP QUIZ!  Is Kagan a Socialist?  Is John Roberts a Marxist?  What was Al Gore’s undergraduate thesis at Harvard was titled?  Score a 10/10 and “the Senate will confirm you unanimously.” [The Daily Beast]

• How to be a BigLaw “lesbian attorney superhero”: Offer a partner a safety pin after his bulging crotch blows out the fly of his pants.  [Never Been Lived Before]

• If you want to feel a lot of unnecessary anxiety, ride along with the oddly annoying (yet not entirely unlikeable) Sam E. Goldberg—AKA Mr. Law School (I know, I know).  He chronicled his voyage through 1L finals week via vlog.  He’s got a big NY internship this summer and promises to post footage from inside the firm on a monthly basis.  We’ll see how well that goes over.  [YouTube]

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Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that, unlike your daily sausage, are not ‘linked’ to heart disease:

• They ‘Evershed’ the wrong guy.  Male lawyer John de Belin was wrongfully sacked by the Leeds, England office of BigLaw firm Eversheds “because his bosses feared they would be sued if they fired his female colleague while she was on maternity leave.” So a court awarded him £123,000—or £61,500 per testicle.  [Daily Mail]

• Don’t let Betty White’s spry surge of popularity give you any ideas, decrepit law firm partners.  You’re old.  And we have a mandatory retirement policy.  So it’s time for you to rascal you way out of the firm, get in your Lexus that’s parked in the blue-signed spot and head out to pasture.  [New York Law Journal]

Read more from the Bitter Newsroom.

1 Comment

  1. Juliet

    May 18, 2010 at 4:49 pm

    Bitter Lawyer, thanks so very much for the mention–I am honored!

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