Bitter News, 6-4-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom with all the majesty of a three-bedroom in Boca Raton:

• How do you pay lawyers to represent you in these trying financial times?  You get people to bet on you.  Investing in litigation is the secret to winning in this economy.  There are funds that invest “in one side of a lawsuit in exchange for a share of any winnings.” Sure, it “raises potentially tricky legal questions,” but it’s fun!  [Dealbook @ The New York Times]

• Hey, moron, the Swedish build crap furniture, so it can only be assumed a Swede would write a crap The Cather in the Rye sequel, BUT the fair use doctrine still exists.  Sorry.  Now, J.D. Salinger might legitimately think he has a shot at winning this case, but that’s because a “crummy judge” (ahem, Sotomayer) has crapped on the first amendment enough to stick up for the “big guy” before.  [The Legal Satyricon]

• So, every “crummy judge” needs to have roots.  (No, this isn’t going to be another “She’s still Sonia from the block” J. Lo/Bronx reference.) Roots determine how the tree grows.  And Sotomayor’s origins as a New York caffeine-addicted prosecutor gave her “the real-life experience” of tackling kiddy porn and public urination that turned her into the “more pro-government” justice-to-be that she is today.  So far, black people like her, white dudes are split (given she might not treat them fairly), and Hispanics are the least impressed.  But those may just be stereotypes talking.  [Washington Post]

• 2010 will be the year of gay marriage in New Hampshire.  And that affects the state’s political landscape.  It will be much more well manicured and spruced up.  (Hoooo, gay stereotype joke, yo!) [Associated Press]

• “Get ready for the summer of serious.” While summer programs of yore were rocking out to Kool in the Gang’s Celebration, this year’s SAs are in a Greed Day Boulevard of Broken Dreams mosh pit.  And by that comparison, you might assume that Green Day is the preferred option because, well, when is Kool in the Gang cool?  But really it’s meant as a metaphor for how broken and angst-ridden this year’s summer experience is turning out.  So 2009 is like Brokedown Palace to pre-2009’s The Holiday. Or 2009 is Six Feet Under AND Lost compared to pre-2009’s Glee.  Or Lord of the Flies is preceded by High Times the magazine.  Ugg.  Those 2009 options are all STILL better than the pre-2009 ones.  Give me a minute.  [The Snark @ The Fulton County Daily Report via Law.com]

• “Take my money, please! Believe it or not, that was the plea Wednesday from a former fish market worker who got $18 million from the city after being paralyzed in the Staten Island ferry accident.” He’s fighting for his lawyer to get his full fee.  [New York Daily News]

• Harvard Law is giving 12 post-9/11 veterans free tuition next year under the federal government’s new Yellow Ribbon Program.  Making about 731 other indebted people mad jealous.  [Harvard Law School]

• South Carolina law school’s chairman is presenting a paper on law and baseball to the Baseball Hall of Fame at the annual Cooperstown Symposium on Baseball and American Culture.  The former state lawmaker says his paper shows links between the origins of baseball and law via the late William S. Stevens’, a fellow lawyer who established legal and baseball history, 1975 publication of an article titled, “The Common Law Origins of the Infield Fly Rule.” [Post and Courier]

• London is the libel capital of the world—even comedians are calling for reform.  So much so, in fact, this article titled “Review of libel law called for by comedians” doesn’t mention a single joke cracker looking for change. [Times Online]

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1 Comment

  1. Bravo

    June 5, 2009 at 9:25 am

    Let’s hear it for the blue collar worker who has more class than the Harvard law guys in my office.

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