Bitter News, 8-6-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as wonky as Steven Tyler at Sturgis:

• “Congratulations!” Sonia is “approved!” And not just by the Turget lady, but by the U.S. Senate.  Judge Sotomayor had some GOP love growing in her confirmation garden, which harvested a vote of 68-31.  Her results weren’t as close as Justice Thomas but were more split than Chief Justice Roberts.  [The New York Times]

soundboard.com

soundboard.com

• We have clearance, Clarence.  And it’s practically 18 wheels and a dozen roses for SCOTUS Justice Thomas and his wife Ginni.  They’re seeing America this summer just as they do every summer—via a 40-foot RV.  (Fitting seeing as Prez Obama just chatted up the RV capital of the world, Elkhart, Indiana.) Considered “real-life RV enthusiasts,” Ginni Thomas raps with like-minded individuals from “somewhere in the Adirondacks.” [WSJ Law Blog]

• Put your dog on a leash, dammit! Rick Dyer got a lawyer to make suburban canine terror a federal issue.  [The Boston Globe]

• “A former University of Illinois law school dean [Heidi Hurd] has made a final effort to distance herself from an admissions scandal, writing a lengthy letter to the state panel charged with investigating the practices.” And yep!  She goes there.  Calls herself a “victim.” [Chicago Tribune]

• BigLaw is 10 to 15 percent less of the (wo)man it used to be.  The pay is less, so now you have to shop at Payless.  And here are some other insulting suggestions that conjure hilarious mental images on how to survive a slashed salary.  Sorry, kids, it’s off to public school.  And hurry up and go—because mom has to highlight her own hair. Jigga whaaa?  [The Snark via Law.com]

• All the wireless paper chase.  None of the paper.  [Law.com]

• Nash Villalobos sounds like a respectable attorney’s name.  Kinda like Neil MacBride.  Or Tony Villar.  But it doesn’t look that way.  Nash was charged with obstruction for allegedly agreeing to “accept $107,000 in exchange for coaching his client to lie to a federal prosecutor and a federal grand jury.” Snookered.  [Los Angeles Times]

• What the Judges Are Up to Lately:

—Judge Patricia Schnegg delayed Chris Brown’s sentencing to scope his community labor. [LA Times]

—Judge Dominique Ross owes $63,693 to her election attorney, per his lawsuit. [Chicago Trib]

—Judge John Koeltl ruled that Coca-Cola rulz—PepsiCo drools.  [Reuters]

—Judge Elizabeth Berry had her DUI case dismissed, ah, because she’s a judge. [Chron.com]

—Judge Gregory Sleet put Delaware closer to being the east coast Vegas sportsbook.  [USA Today]

—Judge Gary Larson said “game on” to Vikings defenders Kevin and Pat Williams.  [Star Trib]

—Judges Lauren Conrad & Kim Kardashian will be guests on America’s Next Top Model. [Examiner]

Got ya on that last one.

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