Bitter News, 9-28-09

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as SNL f-bomb”>fuckin friggin’ unexpected a Jenny Slate’s SNL f-bomb:

• While you’re enjoying those Jager Bombs, please welcome to the Cheetah stage….18-year-old strippers doing a victory poll dance. “The Georgia Supreme Court this morning upheld the right of young women under the age of 21 to shed their clothes at locales in Atlanta where alcohol is served.” [AJC.com]

• In a surprising wave of solidarity, it seems most of you, our readers, are feeling a nagging sense of benevolence for the law school masses waiting to enter the legal profession.  (See poll below.) Despite hellacious competition for limited jobs, countless warnings to avoid law school and the constant lament of too many law programs, more than 60% of ya’ll are still sending sympathetic vibes out into the universe for 1/2/3Ls.  We were expecting more of a “screw ‘um, they were warned” attitude, but I guess we’re dealing with a bunch of softies.

In effort to bitter you up and taint the pity party a bit:

—“Think twice about going to law school – firm chairman says.” [FP Legal Post]

—The firms don’t care about you—unless you’ve reek of Harvard.  And even then… [Bloomberg]

—BigLaw partner admits the law schools put too many lawyers. [Exposing the Law School Scam]

—African Studies is a more lucrative program than a law career these days.  [Daily Princetonian]

—“Big Law, Big Law School, Big Bummer!” Nuf said.  [Chuck Newton]

• Need more evidence that JDs-to-be spit on the writing on the wall?  “The average law student who graduated from a private university in 2008 borrowed more than $91,500 on the way to earning that degree.” The ins and outs of law school debt.  Get to know who owns your ass.  [The Am Law Daily]

• Roman Polanski’s 31 years of avoiding his own rape confession.  [Guardian]

• Put a lid on it—and I don’t mean a hat.  A federal judge dismissed a complaint from a lawyer who alleged he had a constitutional right to wear jeans and a baseball cap in a courtroom.  [Reuters]

• Fact: Playing the squeeze box gets chicks.  And is more profitable than working in legal aid.  Two U.K. attorneys, frustrated with their £70 an hour fixed rates, grabbed an accordion, a guitar and hung out their hats, putting on a street performance that netted their hourly fee in nearly 40 minutes.  [Times Online — hat tip: Law Shucks]

• It’s time for wAcKy LaWsUiTs:

—It’s more the principle: “Man sues BofA for ‘1,784 billion, trillion dollars.’” [Reuters]

—Paging Dr. Recession: “Lawsuit Alleges ER Doctor Let Man Die In Order to Steal His Rolex” [Reuters]

• Preparing to take the LSAT the next morning, Brianna Becker went running to clear her mind, but was hit by a car and killed.  (Jokes withheld out of respect for the dead.) [Statesman.com]

• Erin Brockovich: The new class?  That would probably be TTT lawyer Art Folsom.  But can a University of Denver College of Law alum with a “small-time” defense practice stand up to the superpowers of the American government without the help of a pushup bra?  Folsom now lead counsel for Najibullah Zazi, a man accused of plotting to build and detonate a lethal explosive as part of an active al Qaeda cell.  Certainly the underdog, but do we really want him to win?  [Wall Street Journal]

• The Lily Allen internet backlash.  The English singer/songwriter, who has, maybe, a hit, goes on the social media record that she fully supports a proposed law that banishes those who participate in downloading music illegally to a lifetime without internet access.  She’s being shamed for her outspoken stance given that on her website (since shut down because she claims “the abuse was getting too much”) was a mix tape of songs from various artists available for download…illegally.  Her response was that she had added it long before she was aware of “the workings of the music industry.” But, bottom line, as Jessica Dobias points out: “Ignorance of the law is not an excuse. Educate yourself.” And, if you’re a celebrity making bold statements on the web (AKA life’s unforgiving time capsule) prepare to be sniffed out by every online entity possible.  Even Perez Hilton[Social Media Law Student]

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• While you’re enjoying those Jager Bombs, please welcome to the Cheetah stage….18-year-old strippers doing a victory poll dance. “The Georgia Supreme Court this morning upheld the right of young women under the age of 21 to shed their clothes at locales in Atlanta where alcohol is served.” [AJC.com]

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