Caption This! November 4, 2011

What in the Bitter Lawyer is going on in this picture?

Put your lawyerly wisdom to the test and post a comment below or on Facebook with a witty, hilarious, or brilliant caption. And keep it clean(ish). The editors’ pick will be announced next week.

Last Week’s Winner

Patrick Nolan is a two-time winner now for last week’s Caption This! entry:

Sure the park bench lawyer thinks I should file an employment discrimination case. Pooping out eggs for a month hurts, but look at what they did to Tom the Turkey . . . .

(This week’s photo source:

Bitter Staff is a collection of current and former editors, contributors, and various other lawyers who have written for Bitter Lawyer over the years. Posts include interviews, contests, and other general lawyerly and bitter content.


  1. BL1Y

    November 4, 2011 at 11:15 am

    Stupid finance meltdown. I went to law school to land a banker, not to become a lawyer.

    • Guano Dubango

      November 5, 2011 at 10:37 am

      Yes, but now we men have more opportunities than ever to land a decent woman, and to have intimate sexual contact with many more than we ever were able to in the past, BL1Y. While these women may not be worth marrying, they are good for at least worth a week or two of sexual adventure. That is good for us, as lawyers, no?

  2. evil lawyer

    November 4, 2011 at 12:45 pm

    “Look, it wasn’t so bad that you called him a dried up old prune, and handed him your business card when he asked what you did. If he hadn’t been your firm’s managing partner, it would have hilarious.”

  3. Ellen Barshevsky

    November 4, 2011 at 3:39 pm

    We are NEVER going to get an orgasm if all we get to pick from are these sorry legal excuses for real men. We might as well to just continue to stick with and employ our own electrical joysticks.

  4. Elisabeth

    November 4, 2011 at 3:45 pm

    Dasani? Really? I was hoping for SmartWater.

  5. Kenner R. McQuaid

    November 4, 2011 at 7:29 pm

    Why do they tell us to get here at 9:00 a.m. when we’re #106 on the list?

  6. douglas

    November 5, 2011 at 1:51 am

    Where are Lenny and Squiggy?

  7. Please don't yell at me

    November 6, 2011 at 11:30 pm

    After becoming BFFs and working so closely together, it was a mistake for us to track our menstrual cycles so we could be “Best Menses Buddies.”

    • Please don't yell at me

      November 7, 2011 at 1:10 pm

      Yeah, in the spirit of Milton Berle, Bob Hope or Carlos Mencia, I stole the above from last week’s Big Bang Theory TV show.

  8. MagicCircleJerk

    November 7, 2011 at 11:52 am

    You’re telling me it only goes downhill from here? I’m already fat, homely, over-worked and stressed.

    • Lourine Poovey

      November 7, 2011 at 12:22 pm

      And cannot get any decent guy to pay for my dinner unless I promise him all sorts of things beyond mere sexual favours!

  9. Dr. Love

    November 7, 2011 at 3:43 pm

    Just received the earth shattering news that Justin Bieber has fathered the child of one of their classmates. Oh why couldn’t it have been me!?

  10. Adam

    November 7, 2011 at 8:35 pm

    I don’t get it. Black suits, white shirts, pearls … how did we not win the moot?

  11. TexJudge

    November 8, 2011 at 8:13 pm

    Damn, we haven’t gotten any since the Bush Administration

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