Litigation is the common path for most young attorneys. In law school, the vast majority of subjects are taught through case law, i.e., litigation. In fact, most transactional courses are presented through the litigation lens: contracts, debtor/creditor, real estate transactions, etc. So it’s no surprise that most law school grads head straight to the litigation department. A year or two of being beaten senseless, however, many lawyers begin to investigate these rumors of some happy place in the firm called “trans-act-shun-ul-land” and eventually take up residence there. The rest accept their fate as permanent citizens of Scorched Earth. Here’s why:
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One of the things I didn’t think of when I was thinking of going to law school was how I would have to make new friends. I recognized, of course, that I wouldn’t recognize anyone there. But I forgot that I’d have to remember how to make friends, that this wouldn’t be some continuation of undergrad where I’d see at least one familiar face in all of my classes. That this wasn’t a house party where I wouldn’t know half the people or a volunteering event with multiple RSOs; this was like going to my first college party where I didn’t know anyone but my roommate and the semi-sketchy dude who invited us, except without that my roommate or that dude. If I had realized that, any of that, I’d probably have welcome Shady McSketch with open arms.
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So the Oscars were weird last night. Was that just me or did it seem like something was off the whole night? Maybe it would have helped if I had seen half of the movies. I still have a ton of questions from throughout the night. Why Peter Griffin was singing the entire night? Did Adele try to unwrap her Oscar to find chocolate? Didn’t Afflack get banned from the Oscars after Gigli? Did we ever get an explanation as to why Chicago was talked about 11 years after it came out?
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- Before you ever go to trial, you are super nervous about what it will be like, watch Law & Order, A Few Good Men, and Anatomy of a Murder to try to learn how to do it better.
- You hide the fact that you have never done your own trial. You assume you will mess something up and everyone there will be able to tell you are a rooky. Keep Reading ⇒
As graduation approaches and the job search heats up for my fellow 3Ls, I’ve been sitting serenely on the sidelines knowing that my LL.M. will be extending into the next year. While this is nice for the moment and allows me some clarity while I study for the bar, it also means that people are continuously asking me what I plan on doing with my LL.M. For anyone else in the same situation, here’s a handy list:
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The great Disney philosopher Tony Perkis once stated, “Can you smell it? There’s a life force in here tonight. Do you feel it?” Today, that statement could not be truer. I can feel it in my plums. Its electric in the hallowed halls of jurisprudence. Its Barrister’s Ball time! Law schools across the country are setting up tables in their lounge to sell tickets to the yearly dumpster fire.
We here at Bitter Lawyer have long strived to provide you with the best advice on this annual gala. With that in mind, we present the 5 Things Not To Do At Barrister’s Ball.
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Lawyers like to complain a lot about sucky things, particularly sucky things that are unethical. It’s part of the occupation. Often, however, the perceived suckiness is, in fact, completely ethical. Like office hot tubbing with opposing counsel’s daughter. Or using Times New Roman. Wrong and sucky. But ethical. Here are four additional things we rank as sucky but that still manage to stay within the ethical bar.
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The following is a transcript of a witness deposition conducted by two California lawyers during an automobile personal injury lawsuit from July 2012. It is being reposted here on the web solely for educational purposes.
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The farther I get into law school, the harder it gets to avoid the reality that, at some point, my education will end. And at that point the real world will begin. The real world will of course include bar prep, the bar exam, and some type of employment: unemployment, funemployment, part-time employment, under-employment, non-legal employment, or the elusive and mystical fulltime legal employment.
As that finish line inches ominously closer, I find myself in more and more conversations with friends and family and random strangers about what I’m going to do next. They ask what I want to do when I graduate, what kind of law I want to practice, what my plan is. Seven months ago, I didn’t know how to answer their questions. I still don’t.
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