I’m Sexing a Paralegal


I’m having sex with a paralegal.  Bad idea?

No, it’s genius.  Nothing a law firm likes more than sexual harassment.  In fact, it’s probably the best way to make partner – to wind up on the wrong end of an embarrassing and costly lawsuit.  It also shows terrific judgment and discretion, which, as you might imagine, are relevant to the practice of law.  OF COURSE IT’S A BAD IDEA.  If you want to get laid, find a paralegal at another firm.  Or a barista at Starbucks.  Or a hooker.  But don’t nail a paralegal in your own firm.  If you want to make partner anyway.

Got a question for Ex-Bitter?  Email it to info@bitterlawyer.com.

Ex-Bitter is a former big firm lawyer who now doles out advice to anyone who asks. Got a question? Email it to advice@bitterlawyer.com. Or read more Advice from an Ex-Bitter.

6 Comments

  1. Not bitter yet.

    August 20, 2008 at 12:14 pm

    Several guys at my firm are constantly hooking up with paralegals. Everyone (including partners) talks shit about them.  Don’t think people don’t know. Keep it in your pants unless you want to be branded a desperate, unprofessional sleeze-bag.

  2. YrNextBestAsst

    August 26, 2008 at 7:07 am

    Oh, oh…pick me! LMAO

  3. Skaddie

    August 27, 2008 at 10:51 am

    Hey Al…you could have at least been a gentlemen and helped her out!

  4. Al Dickman

    September 4, 2008 at 8:47 am

    Bad idea.  Not worth it in the end.  Look at what happened to the guy who poked Palin’s kid.  He’s on national TV and is already part of that family!  I’ll bet he wishes he kept his zipper up.

  5. Alma Federer

    September 21, 2008 at 1:15 pm

    What is the attraction to paralegals?  That they know the law?  That they can Shepardize a case?  This is not enough to make me want to go to bed with them.  Most paralegals are fat and bald and 55 years old; as a woman, I would not want to have sex with them.  I am supposing this article is geared to younger woman paralegals, but it does not make that clear.  I suggest that the Bitter Lawyer make clear that it is referring to younger female paralegals (presumably for male associate sexing) rather than paralegals of the type I know, who I would never go to bed with.

  6. Pitt

    November 26, 2008 at 11:14 am

    All the above, and you’re not doing his/her career prospects any favors.

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