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Law Firm 10

The Strangled Cries of Lawyers in Love

by Law Firm 10
11:39 AM, March 4th, 2010

I’ll be blunt: Dating a fellow lawyer—especially one from the same firm—is an epically bad idea. I understand the time-honored “don’t shit where you eat” principle. But that’s not the precise problem I’m having. Let’s rewind to only a few short weeks ago. On a cold, snowy night in January, I silenced my anxious pessimism, swallowed my doubtful resolve and allowed myself to fall for Carson, the firm’s new-ish corporate lateral from a few floors down. The honeymoon phase was stunning. I adored every second of it. How could I not?...


Unethical & Amoral

All’s Fair in Lust and Recruiting

by Matthew Richardson
4:12 PM, February 24th, 2010

I was feeling particularly bored the other day. I had been working round-the-clock on a deal that was about to close. Hadn’t had sex in days. Hadn’t tasted a drop of booze in a week. And I think my favorite Mexican stripper, Luciana, was deported last weekend. Desperate for a cheap thrill, I did something I rarely ever do. Even though I knew it was a mistake, I needed the rush. So last week, I said, “Screw it,” and returned the call of a random recruiter. The recruiter’s voicemail sounded something like this...


Ten Ways for Women NOT to Get Sex in Law School

by Bitter Vault
12:12 PM, March 2nd, 2010

As you girls know, law school is a vile institution in which hot males come in the same frequency as in a nursing home. But that’s no reason not to always be prepared. A female law student’s uber-busy lifestyle can easily cause her to overlook her own twitchy tendencies and turn a blind eye to parts of her busted self that are major turn-offs. But if she has needs—and we know she has needs—she’ll need to mind the way she projects herself if she hopes to ever meet a man in the barren law school landscape. To help shine a light, here are some of the self-imposed sex-blocking characteristics female law students will assuredly need to overcome to find a man:...



 

Advice from an Ex-Bitter

I Want to Be a Hollywood Screenwriter

by Ex-Bitter
03/05/10

Dear Ex-Bitter: I’m a third-year at a big Chicago firm. It’s okay; I don’t think I’m on the verge of getting fired. But I really want...



Bitter News

by Bitter Staff
All the news that fits

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom as awkward as Pam Anderson reasoning her sex tape to her kids:

• Start spreading the news—New York is the frivolous lawsuit capital of the world.  If you can’t get your lawsuit through there, you can’t win it anywhere. “[A]ccording to ‘An Empire Disaster,’ a report released this week by the Pacific Research Institute, lawsuit abuse is rampant in New York State.” With the second-highest tort losses of any state and the third-worst tort system in the country, big payouts (such as a $14.1 million award to a woman who laid down on the tracks of the NYC subway and was hit by a train in a failed suicide attempt) is killing the state’s economy.  “Tort lawsuits cost the state’s economy more than $16 billion in 2006.” Litigation is the new American dream.  [New York Post]

• Speaking of the New York court system, how can anyone ever even begin to defend Khalid Sheikh Mohammed?  Here are six possible defenses to argue.  Hopefully before he abducts Bloomberg’s daughter[Fox News]

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