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Bitter News, 2-2-10

by Bitter Newsroom
12:56 PM, 02/02

Headlines from the Bitter Newsroom that are part of an abstinence-only education program:

• Obama is obviously a big focus of this year’s Black History Month, but one libertarian actually thinks our President is nothing more than skuzzy lawyer quoting his fees.  “Obama should win an Academy Award for the role of a lawyer lying about the true ‘state of the union.’” [Independent Political Report]

• February is Black History Month.  Take it away, SCOTUS Blog!  [SCOTUS Blog]

• Don’t you dare try to challenge our country’s brightest youth by making A’s harder to obtain, like what Princeton is trying.  They might not get into Yale Law as easily.  Future lawyer need grade inflation, damnit!  [The Choice Blog @ NYT]

• Toyota is in a hurt locker of legal problems, but what about Ford?  Harold Ford Jr., that is.  We’re starting to hear a lot about this lawyer (Univ. of Michigan Law ’96) and former Tennessee representative who keeps dancing around officially announcing his candidacy in a primary challenge against Senator Kirsten Gillibrand in New York.  Stephen Colbert somewhat embarrassingly called him out on a few discrepancies last night.  (He’s no John Yoo.) Perhaps he should have warmed up by doing an interview with Bitter Lawyer when we requested it six months ago.  Hope his meeting with the abortion rights group today went better.  [Washington Post]

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• The new OCI rules have been proposed, which will totally revamp 2L recruiting.  But Jones Day isn’t thrilled.  What else is new?  [The Am Law Daily]

• Even though we’re getting plenty of coverage of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” we’re still pissed that SCOTUS blocked our view of the California Prop 8 trial by banning cameras.  So we’ll need to reply on a modern version of the talkie.  A group of filmmakers are bringing the same-sex marriage trial to life by “creating dramatic reenactments of the trial with the help of an all-star cast. There are 12 scheduled ‘episodes,’ one for each day of the trial.” But if you’re an unmarried gay person, no need to on reenacted anything in your actual life because now there’s Grinder, the iPhone app that’s “the biggest boon for gay sex since Craigslist.” [WSJ Law Blog]

• That new public law school in Massachusetts is “OK to go!” Welcome to a whole new legal education wormhole?  [Boston Herald]

• “The controversial issue of retirement policies at law firms has come to the forefront again.” But don’t tell Robert Morgenthau[Chicago Tribune]

• Celebrity legal action is great fun—like “colorful contract disputes” such as Conan’s.  (See: 10 Stars Who Sued The Pants Off Hollywood for nine other greats.) Then there’s the realm of “cease and desist,” which is even better fun.  (“Lawyers representing Steven Tyler have sent a ‘cease and desist’ letter to Aerosmith’s management, following reports that the band is looking for a replacement singer.”) But the best fun happens when celebrities get arrested and need representation.  Like comedian Andy Dick, whose preliminary hearing on sexual abuse charges in West Virginia has been postponed til March so Mark Geragos can come to his aid.  [Herald Dispatch]

• A court ruled that John Grisham is now officially libel free.  You can read this story about it or wait for the compelling book on tape.  [Huffington Post]

• If Rip Torn would have followed the ‘Legal Blog Watch Checklist for Bank Robbers’ more carefully, none of this would have ever happened.  Right away, he violated rule #1: An effective disguise helps.  [She Knows]

• Let’s end on a low note: Justin Mentell, the actor played lawyer Garrett Wells on Boston Legal from 2005 to 2006, died last night in a car accident.  Happy Tuesday!  [US Weekly]

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