Legal Humor Roundup for October 6, 2011


Tip to clients: if ordered to go to anger management, don’t bring your knife. Or, if you do, don’t go stabbing anyone. In more depressingly humorous law-related news today, law professors suggest marriages by Skype, the merits of a civil rights lawsuit alleging forced consumption of Rush Limbaugh, and does being honest at least give you back your Fifth Amendment rights? It’s the happy hour law review for Thursday, October 6, 2011.

1Sometimes the first sentences says it all: “A 19-year-old woman was arrested Tuesday after allegedly stabbing a woman during an anger management session at Bellevue College.” | Bellevue Reporter

2Yesterday, Gia Scatchell had a post yesterday about a Mexico City proposal to allow temporary two-year marriage licenses. Today? Distance marriages by video conference, or what will soon be called the bonds of Holy Skyprimony. | mlive.com

3The Lawyerist’s news junkie has picked up the story of a woman suing a Houston-area sheriff and sheriff’s office because, when she was detained by a sheriff’s deputy, she was handcuffed and later forced to listen to Rush Limbaugh “make derogatory comments about black people” in the sheriff’s car all the way to the jail. In fairness to her and her attorney, however, she also alleges that, after her car broke down on the side of the freeway:

a sheriff’s deputy … pulled behind her, wrote her a ticket for driving on the shoulder, decided to arrest her, followed her to the hospital when her suddenly racing heart prompted a call to paramedics, then took her into custody again after she was treated by doctors and finally drove her to jail.

4A man suspected of kidnapping finally surrendered after a 12-hour standoff with police in South Dakota. When he came out, he was wearing a cardboard Burger King crown and had a stuffed parrot dog toy sitting on his shoulder. A neighbor was overheard saying something about meth addiction, which may have also explained the tuna and urine being thrown around on the walls of the house. | Argus Leader

5Hey, at least he’s honest. When police pulled over a man on a bike with a backpack full of tools and asked what he was doing in the area, the man replied that “I hadn’t stolen anything tonight. I had the tools with me in case the opportunity arose. I was only scouting the area.” | Legal Juice

(Photo: http://www.flickr.com/photos/jeffslinker/5255953660)

The Bitter Bartender knows proper mixology and curates some of the best stories of law firm humor, abuse, and woe. Have a story or submission? Email us at info@bitterlawyer.com.

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