Strippers Take the Gloves Off at Zoning Board Meeting

According to WSWF TV, strip club workers in Atlanta successfully argued against a zoning change that would have forced their clubs to relocate. According to the story which is sourced to the Associated Press, “Residents in the neighborhood say the strip clubs are bringing down property values and contributing to home and car break-ins and other crime.” One of the dancers pointed out that the neighbors “don’t have to come to the clubs and they should just move.”

The zoning board sided with the dozens of strippers that attended the hearing. There was a heated debate on the issue that lasted over an hour, or approximately eighteen songs.

We all know that parenting is all about keeping your daughter off the pole. But these residents crossed the line when they tried to keep other peoples kids from performing the saintly act of a backwards show girl with a split leg variation.

The property owners were doomed from the start. First of all, everyone knows those zoning board members love to get down. Those ecstasy fueled review hearings are no place for stuffy pornography-counts-as-cheating types. When the local residents showed up they probably couldn’t even tell the difference between the strippers that were there to argue the motion and the strippers that do the halftime show. Second, their logic is flawed. If the residents are worried about people running around on the streets committing crimes, the answer isn’t fewer strip clubs, it’s more. If they had a few more places to go, they’d be off the street in no time.

It is a shame this came down to such a fight. Really, the two sides could have come to a compromise. Why couldn’t the residents drop their shenanigans motion for half priced entry to the clubs on Wednesdays. Sure it isn’t going to be the A team up there, but the chicken wings alone will make it worth the trip.

(photo: beautiful dancer on the pole from Shutterstock)

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1 Comment

  1. Frank

    May 16, 2013 at 10:13 pm

    As hard working lawyers, we’ve earned the unalienable right to clean, fresh and attractive women. We need to categorically reject any effort or attempt to limit our access to said pussy.

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