After almost five years of epic BigLaw drudgery and misery, I finally decided it was time to choose lifestyle over status and pay. In other words, I joined a small firm, a/k/a “a litigation boutique.” Trouble is, I’m realizing that my decision was completely flawed because it was based on the faulty assumption that the small firm I was joining would offer me something positive in exchange for each trade-off. Unfortunately, almost a year has passed, and I now realize that there’s been nothing but negatives. Lest any other BigLaw mid-level associate fall for the same foolishness, I’ve compiled a list of the things I hate about small firm practice:
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At conferences throughout the year, I’m often pigeonholed by attendees, who look at my name and ask me this question: “Who the fuck are you?” After I explain who I am and I buy a few rounds of drinks, people start talking to me. After a few more drinks, I tell them why my advice for solo attorneys should be followed by all BigLaw associates.
At absolutely no charge, here’s my liquor-free version of why BigLaw should listen to me, now.
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Being low man on the totem pole at a boutique law firm requires the type of lawyering easily understood by John Q. Public. Laymen can wrap their heads around what I do because I’m the definition of what Hollywood portrays a lawyer to be. The type of law I handle is familiar to every Joe the Plumber. I’m also the guy they’re talking about when people call lawyers “greedy bastards,” “bottom feeders,” or “scum.”
The idea of a corporate lawyer doesn’t register with the average Joe. While I know what you guys do (memo to file; case law research; 10,000-page doc reviews), John and Jane Doe have no concept of this type of existence. So, when people hear someone say he or she is a first year associate working on the Lehman Brothers bankruptcy, they don’t equate that to the actual responsibility, which is binder-making and typo hunting. They just assume it’s big shit, so they’re less inclined to ask that person to help fix a parking ticket. I, however, am at the other end of the spectrum.
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